By Craig Winger
The World Database of Happiness (yes, there is one) reports that Iceland is one of the happiest places on earth. That’s right, Iceland. And, yes, I know it’s cold and dark six months out of the year. I’m just giving you the data.
What’s their secret to happiness? Research indicates that a primary factor is their willingness to embrace failure.
Icelanders therefore, are not afraid to fail or to be imperfect. This leads to an ability and drive to pursue what they enjoy in a positive and productive way. Digging deeper, we find that being unsuccessful in Iceland is viewed as feedback, not as failure. This simple shift in perspective has a great impact on feeling good about life and being creative. When we hesitate in life it is usually due to either a fear of the shame that accompanies failure or the unwillingness to become vulnerable, and for good reason. As a nation our level of respect is low for people who put everything on the line and fail. Consequently, successful creators must be shame resilient and seriously courageous. Not surprisingly, we tend to apply this stigma of failure to all of our relationships, career and job development, and simply growing as an individual. For more research and information on shame and vulnerability, I suggest reading, “Daring Greatly,” by Brené Brown. It is a wake up call to all of us.
What does it take to move beyond our limiters? First, check and document your motivations, attitudes, knowledge base and skills in relation to what you desire to do. This could take some time. If they are good, (but not perfect), then go ahead develop your plan. On the other hand, if you’re lacking the knowledge or skills you need to get started, don’t let that stop you. Simply write education or research into your plan!
The first and most important component of your plan should be clarifying your purpose or your greatest motivation to engage in a venture. If you need help with this read “Start with Why,” by Simon Sinek. This book will help you nail down the answers to the many questions that will come up as you’re refining your reasons for embarking on a new project.
The rest of the plan should include a clear path and specific milestones to move you toward a goal. Don’t worry if you don’t have everything worked out to the end. The plan will evolve as you become more inspired. A well outlined initial path, however, will increase your energy of confidence, grow your energy of certainty about who you are and what value you offer, and lead you to share your energy of enthusiasm with every person you meet. These are three key energies that will move you beyond the self-limiters of not wanting to fail and increase your probability of success.
So why not do what you love? If you have the desire to launch a business or life venture, but feel paralyzed by the fear of failure, it might be a good time to seek to help to move beyond internal fears of shame, vulnerability and failure; and increase your energies of confidence, certainty and enthusiasm.
Craig Winger is a certified business coach in Tallahassee who created Spectrum Coaching as a resource for those business people wanting to “ increase individual excellence, engagement and performance, leading to increased customer satisfaction, employee retention and vendor support, ultimately increasing profitability.”
